relative ties

Sometimes I forget that I've lived the life I have.  Never a dull moment, it has always been intensive.  If only my mind would catch up to my heart I wouldn't still pour water over so many dead flowers.   To forgive and forget sometimes only works if the bridge stays burnt.

The best lesson my father never taught me was to make sure that the people I love have no reason to consider any different.  Sarcasm is a vicious tool of manipulation if your kid doesn't know you will always love him and be there for him.  He needs to know he won't be left on a random street corner for doing something wrong.  Some gifts you can't give back- but this self-loathing tendency & brutal anger is a legacy I refuse to pass on.  Thanks anyway.

Perhaps what has set me apart so much from others in this life is having to first seriously consider self-reliance and self preservation at 7 years old, and redefine family while I still had most of my baby teeth.
There is a difference between relatives and family.

Some actions forever alter the way a person can view another.  To forgive and forget sometimes only works when the bridge stays burnt.  But the bond linking us is more ingrained in each of us than I care to admit.  The Family Ties that bind us feel like handcuff bruises, but I bear the constant reminder to continue watering the flowers growing underneath, the brothers my parents want so much to be nothing like me.
Have you ever been to a comedy show, the comedian picks you out of the crowd and makes jokes at your expense?  It's in that way, that it is funny to see how caring and attentive he now can be.   I would say that my dad did his best, and as a result I am uncomfortable with myself when subject to him simply being himself.

Most parents will always help their children with anything they can.  A lot of parents will help their children do anything except be themselves.  What a fine line it is...

..."If your father and his father were fish out of water, you must break the cycle"